What do I really achieve?

I am not good at studies in the earlier age, went poly late and quite playful. Never mature, even now, I was wondering if I am suffering from some disorder.

I worked for 12 years already. I don fill like I achieve anything at all but achieving all the bad side and got myself in trouble instead. Debts and smoking are the killing point for me, really need my God’s help to solve, seriously.

When I see my mum being happy with her grand children from my sis, I was happy too and at the same time , disappointed with myself that I could not provide her 1 for her to enjoy her old age. I already disappointed my Dad, yet I do not want to disappoint my Mum and there is absolutely nothing I can fi about it, really what am I living for…

Desperate

Help

I have been trying ti clear the credit card money, every month and without fail. But it seems like these legal loansharks have no sympathy. My owing balance seems to forever be near the limit even if I did not use any of the card anymore.

Anyone with 20,000 can borrow me to clear? I will work out a monthly payment .

Eternal grateful